Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Roll Away Your Stone, I'll Roll Away Mine

CAN I PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GET MY POTTERMORE EMAIL!?!??!!  IT'S BEEN FOREVERRRRRRRR and I had to endure Shannon GOING THROUGH THE WHOLE WEBSITE while I fled to the opposite side of the room and forced my brain to pay attention to the Princess Diaries 2.  If that isn't dedication, I don't know what is.  I'm consumed by the fear that I will be sorted into Slytherin, though... if it happens I will absolutely cry.

I signed my lease and various other weird forms today for my new Manhattan apartment!  The only bad thing about moving to New York is that I won't live with/see Kate every day.  We said bye tonight and I cried as I drove home.  Pathetic.  Best friends like the Kate don't grow on trees though, ya only get one every 22.5 years.

I'm suddenly afraid to get old.  I'm not scared to die or anything, but I'm scared to gradually decay and become more and more yucky.  I don't WANT old papery skin and blue nails and my neck to look like a  vag and to have my mouth be constantly open and drooling.  Or be helped to the toilet.  Or force fed fiber and all sorts of nasty things.  I plan to binge eat myself to death around the age of 70.  Settle down on the couch and just... let myself go.  It's not suicide, it's a humanitarian act so no one will have to cart me around and be sad and miserable.

Every now and then I appall myself with my own behavior.  An impulsive nature and a weak will are a terrible combination.  Especially when you mix in a little residual Catholic guilt.

For now, I can't wait to move.  I REALLY can't wait to quit my job!

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