Monday, July 19, 2010

I read too much Jane Austen

A disappointing truth: Pride and Prejudice is not only my favorite book, but also my favorite drawn out tv mini-series (and that's a toughy, BBC rules) and I am not a heroine (yet). Letdown central, as I have all the makings to be a great one. I'm a Lizzy, never a Lydia, close to an Emma, definitely not a Elinor.

Heroine requirements that I currently meet:
1. Sass. Acerbic wit is probably closer to the truth, but I do have a pretty spot on sense of humor. Life is funny, it deserves to be laughed at more often than not.
2. Overly active imagination + overly emotional responses. Drama at it's finest, I'd get scorned pretty good and fall in love nicely after.
3. Not butt ugly. Heroines can't be busted, otherwise they'd be relegated to best friend with glasses.
3b. Not stupid. Which is nice.

1. Grace. I am a clumsy fool.
2. Dance skills. Apparently that's the only place you can meet men like Darcy or Knightly, so I'm a bit screwed there.
3. Waistline. Drinking my face off in college didn't do me any favors.
4. Mess of sisters. Even Emma had a sister. Fanny did, but she was sent away. I would have sent her away too, she was wretchedly boring and Edmund was a turd. And a blood relative. Anyway, Mom and Dad failed me with only one younger brother. I did use to dress him up as a girl though, so maybe all isn't lost.

The great appeal of being a heroine is that they don't have to change anything important about themselves. They find true love and only have to modify the parts of their personalities that were irksome, if at all. The love between the hero and the heroine is big potatoes, enhancing what is good and mollifying demons. Every girl deserves to be her own heroine in her love story. I need a bit more guts and a little less caution.

1 comment:

  1. why can't a girl just ALWAYS be a heroine in her own story :p